35. Robert Southey to Grosvenor Charles Bedford, 26 December 1792 ⁠* 

Wednesday Dec. 26. 92 Bristol

My dear friend

I hoped to have seen you before this day. that hope like most of mine is disappointed. my father is now in heaven. on Monday week I attended him to the grave. who knows but my next visit thither may be final — I ought to have written to you before but the subject was painful & you will excuse me. he had been long declining. evident however as this was I still deceived myself. when I passed thro Bath to Oxford I staid at my fathers & saw him in his bed — he prest my hand with affection & for the only time in his life blest me. why it was I know not but it struck me that I never should see him more. I never did. in a better world I shall.

Of this no more — the subject is painful to me & cannot be agreable to you. to his loss I am resigned. I am even thankful for it when I consider how grievous a burden is a heart opprest by injustice & misfortune. our meeting you see is thus deferrd & the melancholy silence of sorrow wears away with me that season appropriated to festivity. I have however resources in my own reflexions & solitude I have never found irksome — one book succeeds another — I take the pen for relaxation & at least possess negative happiness.

you will visit me at Baliol at the Installation [1]  I hope. there will be a great chair a good fire & a bottle & I flatter myself with the hope of introducing you to the only man upon earth whom I at once love & respect. [2]  he has half promised me his company. I depend upon yours — the opportunities of happiness are so rare that we ought to snatch them eagerly ere they disappear. where is young Wynn? he never will write to me & I am tired with expostulating. I asked him to send Collins’s letter long before the end of term & he has never noticed the letter perhaps he never received the letter. this government trick of opening private correspondence is very unpleasant. next come lettres de cachet Bastille & good night to poor Basil [3]  —

Collins’ last I have, & thank him for. your postscript did not surprize. but you have a sad trick of keeping letters long after they are wrote. the Miller [4]  was a true Philosopher & I wish I was of his school — such doctrines are far more calculated for promoting happiness than the abstruse wisdom of the Samian. [5]  the metaphysics of Plato the dry reason of Aristotle or the grossly-interpreted tenets of Epicurus. [6]  I might add the witty impiety of Voltaire & the artful infidelity of Hume. [7]  the man who destroys religion deprives us of the only substantial happiness. you will believe me. I cannot write. my intention was to fill the sheet but it impossible to command attention when one particular subject engrosses the mind. do write me & believe me in every situation

most sincerely yours

Robert Southey

I send you this merely to fill up — you will it no ways equal to the former

Titus [8]  to Berenice [9] 

———— [18] 

<Of these epistles a few words. four years back I wrote one from B. to Titus & began an answer. the only copy I had was with all my earliest pieces in a foul book, I lent this to one whom I conceivd would take care of it. the book was lost to my eternal sorrow for all in it is bad. & I have reason to think it is still preservd — so some time hence these cursed rhymes will rise up in judgement against me. the epistle was very bad & I could only recollect the beginning — the two first lines as they now stand are all that remain of it.

you now have both & if you will add alter & correct them — by continual correction they may in time be good. the first is best. this last hardly tolerable. I will hint some topics which I could wish you to touch upon. some lines in answer to those “the silent lute &c. wish of Titus to place Berenice upon the throne. unwilling to hold her in any other rank than that of partner in his throne. you will find many others. Beaumont & Fletcher [19]  wrote plays together. — surely it more practicable to write poems.

you will wonder at this crammd sheet after last nights inability to proceed. but idleness is the worst of companions. I want employment & know you like a long letter.

you will let me hear from you soon & do say how affairs go on in London & send me the names of the prisoners in the tower. [20]  surely it is better to run mad with politics than to turn maniac or frantic. next Tuesday begins a new year. I expect a good epistle from you upon that day & promise you one which I shall set about immediately upon concluding this. remember however that I hope to hear from by return of Post. will you send me the ode you did for your brother quique pii vates & Phœbo digna locuti. [21]  you shall have plenty in return of all sorts. I have a tolerable Satire addrest to you but cannot send it by the Post upon this levelling subject — another in embrio upon the grand Leveller Death. say what you will he puts all upon an equality & may one day (no matter how soon) level me with the well wiggd Doctors & well titled champions of Aristocracy. it is very seldom I hear from you — so I remain like a solitary oyster feeding upon thought — a most unsubstantial diet. in this hoggish city my acquaintances are few my friends fewer. friends however I have elsewhere & what need to care for the world beside? let the world wag how it will — let Despotism triumph or Freedom prevail I will still use my pen if I can in peace — if I must quit it for the musquet it is but cutting off a few years perhaps of disappointed hopes.> [22] 

<For your friendly invitation & that of Collins accept my best thanks & make my excuse to them. remember me to your Brother likewise — 1792 is expiring — good god how many events have transpird — from the fall of Gualbertus [23]  to that of Louis! [24]  from my libel upon rod to Paines upon sceptres!  [25]  of all this more by Tuesday. my letter shall reach you then. are you in any of these tremendous associations? our church wardens have devised a curious test all loyal subjects are desird to sign their names to an address. such is their artifice that to my knowledge they made a child of ten years old write his name. thus they mean to know those who believe not in the divine right &c. never shall the name of your friend be prostituted so basely.> [26]