111. Robert Southey to Grosvenor Charles Bedford, 24 [October] 1794

111. Robert Southey to Grosvenor Charles Bedford, 24 [October] 1794 *
Friday. 24. <October> [1] 1794
My dear Grosvenor.
Your parcel with the laconic note in the direction, & your letter urging Wynns invitation have reachd me. I wish I could be at Oxford — but it cannot be.
It is an important period of my life. events of magnitude to me & mine are agitating nor can I steal myself from the scene of action. spare one day Grosvenor & come to Bath. in a humble situation you will find a good reception — you will see me — & her who will one day be mine.
Last Friday I was turned out of doors by my Aunt — & left in a wet night to walk back to Bath without one penny in my pocket — because my resolution was fixed on going to America & marrying one to whom Fortune had allotted a doom very similar to my own. I attempted to reason — but in vain. I listened patiently to invective reproach & abuse not only lavished upon me but upon one for whom I felt more agitated. every pulse swelld with emotion & indignation. yet was I calm in appearance — & on that moment one of the most trying I ever experienced I can look back with self approbation.
God bless you Grosvenor. the anxieties & care I have known you never can know. may you experience the same happiness.
tis a long time to March.
I am in a situation which calls forth all the energy of my character. soothing my Mother — reasoning with her & endeavouring to lessen her regret for my Aunt. I pardon her. but echo — We will never meet again. she should have spared my feelings for I pitied hers.
my marriage will hardly take place in England for obvious reasons. Edith Fricker is of my own age. her face expresses the mildness of her disposition — & if her calm affection cannot render me happy I deserve to be wretched. she is mild & affectionate. you know me.
I send you a sonnet. tho but indifferent it is better than my prose. my heart is heavy.
fare thee well Grosvenor. to quit you will be the severest & the last I shall ever endure.
Robert Southey.
τομορρο ι αμ το βε ιντροδυσεδ το α προφετ!!! [2]